Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Choose your own Loopventure: Nazi Fun

So we're fucking around at work on Craigslist, when we came across this...

"Hello selling lots of military items us uniforms ww2 and newer about seven uniforms lots of badges on them also one original nazi banner very large will take 2,200 for all flag alone is worth at least 1,200 i paid 1,500 for the uniform alone over ten years ago. i also have lots of barn collectibles old saws one large cross cut several oil lamps, several cotton scales and other old scales i have over 1,000 in these items which i have collected around 15 years if you know how to ebay you can almost double your money i will take 2,800 for the whole lot. call me if interested 409 682 5634"

Did someone say barn collectibles? We decided to email our new friend in League City:

Dear Sir, we are very interested in your antique saws and other WW2 fanfare, are they still available? Can you give the estimated size of the uniforms? We are a 42 Long, any chance they will fit? How big is the flag (dimensions)? - Mr. Brown, inside the loop

His response in a day:

Mr. Brown, yes they are still available. the uniforms very [yes, we know] in size so you will need come and try them out. the flag is about 10X12'. please come look.

Us:

Great! 10X12 would make for great bed sheets for our son, he's a bit of a history buff. We'll bring a pick-up truck to get the antique barn treasures. Please have all these fine things out and available for viewing and ultimately transport. We assume $2,800.00 USD in cash is fine. We'll be down in LC on Saturday, we will call around lunch time.

His response this morning:

I don't appreciate waiting for your call all day saterday. I have the collectable all ready for you to pick up. Are you still interested?

CHOOSE YOUR OWN LOOPVENTURE
We could:
(a) Truck down to League City with $2,800 in cash, try on all the uniforms, take pictures with the flag and get cold feet at the last moment.
(b) Email back that we are still interested, then email under a different CL user name and start a Fuhrious bidding war.
(c) See if he'll drive the stuff up and give him an address to a quaint home in the 5th Ward.
(d) Don't mess with a man in possession of ancient barn saws and Nazi flags, go get some low-cal Berripop instead.

You decide

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

(c)

Anonymous said...

Tell him you've decided the flag must be fake because you looked it up on the internet and discovered the Holocaust is a lie. Be insistent. Then post the ensuing crazy kook flamewar. Bonus points if you can provoke him into threatening to kill you with his antique guns.

Ed Wrath said...

A!

Harms said...

B

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