Looprivia Vol 3: Talking Tacos

Its Looprivia time glue junkies! Put on your thinking caps, take a lungful out of that trusty Scotchgard bag and test your knowledge. First to comment with all correct answers gets a series of absolutely miserable prizes:

- A mint VHS copy of the 1992 sensation Bebe's Kids
- A hilarious picture of cuntpunchers: UB40 being gagged and tortured in an undisclosed Houston location for their crimes against humanity
- A cooler full of gorilla organs
- Two certified D. Burnes handrolled blunts from three years ago we found in our suitcase yesterday
- A signed plaster molding of Don Herbert's (aka Mr. Wizard's) Mastodon of a dick

The cocky stare of a man who's sexed your mother

- A heavily liquored up D. Swisher will sing Don't Cry by Guns N' Roses at Christin's Tailgate next Saturday topless with your name and phone number in glitter paint on his chest.

If you think by answering the following questions with accuracy will see you hauling a paralytic Dick back to his mansion in the clouds, then you're correct, because we want no part of him once glitter's involved.

- Looprivia Vol 3: Kissing Tacos -

1. How often does El Rey on Washington change the fryer oil?
a. Hourly
b. Daily
c. Weekly
d. Not since the Franco-Mexican War

2. When in line at Brothers Taco House, you're probably...
a. in the ghetto
b. about to order the best breakfast tacos in Houston
c. hungover and stained from last night's Jaeger-copia party
d. standing next to a convicted murderer
e. all of the above

3. True or false? The El Tiempo on Richmond uses only the finest cut of racing dog in its Tacos al Carbon.

4. Which one of these things doesn't belong?
a. Tony's Mexican Restaurant and Cantina in the Heights
b. Mathew Perry
c. a greased rubber fist
d. heterosexual intercourse

First to comment correctly...